Dear Dave,
I started following your plan at the first of the year. It was one of my New Year’s resolutions. I even budgeted for Christmas each month. I’ve already gotten my holiday shopping done early, but in the process, I went a little crazy and overspent. Realistically, I know things will be okay. I stayed on track all year until now, but I’m still feeling ashamed about blowing my budget this month after doing so well the rest of the year. Do you have any suggestions for dealing with the guilt and getting motivated again?
Madelyn
Dear Madelyn,
You decided to take control of your finances nearly a year ago. And up until just recently it sounds like you were doing a great job. Lots of folks make mistakes in the first year. It’s only natural when you’re trying on a completely new behavior, whether it’s with money or something else.
You’ve already made the decision to change your life, and a few spending mistakes this month doesn’t change that. It also doesn’t wipe out nearly a year’s worth of discipline and hard work. So, I’m proud of you! And for what it’s worth, I give you permission to stop beating yourself up, and start moving forward again.
Most people don’t take time to identify where they want to go in life, or how to get there. They just shuffle along. They blame situations, circumstances, and even other people, for where they are. Some even think it’s someone else’s job to take care of them. That’s called being a child. Children do what’s fun in the moment, and they don’t plan ahead. Adults devise a plan. They stick to it. And, they don’t let one little mistake ruin a whole year’s worth of work.
After I went broke years ago, I made plenty of mistakes in the process of learning a new, and better, way of handling money. Do yourself a favor, okay? Think back to all those months when you were doing so well. You’ve already proven you can make this thing work. So please, don’t let one bad month overshadow a year’s worth of great work. Kicking a bad habit is hard. It’s tough. And no one—I repeat, no one—does it perfectly.
I want you to focus on the future, Madelyn. Clean up this one, little mess. Then put it behind you, and promise yourself you’ll pay more attention going forward to your spending when the holidays and special occasions come around.
You can do it!
— Dave
* Dave Ramsey is a nine-time national bestselling author, personal finance expert and host of The Ramsey Show. He has appeared on Good Morning America, CBS This Morning, Today, Fox News, CNN, Fox Business and many more. Since 1992, Dave has helped people take control of their money, build wealth and enhance their lives. He also serves as CEO for Ramsey Solutions.
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